Saturday 16 February 2013

Happy Shit Water Day


On a recent weekend when Dylan was out of town I was reminded of our love and support for each other.

Via text.
After one of our beloved children had clogged the toilet.

I’ve removed names for this story. I simply do not have enough money for that therapy fund deposit. Now I’m laughing that I wrote the word ‘deposit’ in a story about a clogged toilet. Brilliant, just brilliant.

Me: Where is the plunger.  She clogged the toilet. Again.
Dylan: Under the sink in the upstairs washroom. Damn, that kid has large logs.
Me: I know right? There’s not even any toilet paper in there. She gave a courtesy flush before she wiped. Then had to waddle with low riding pants to another bathroom to wipe. My life is glorious.

Me: It’s not working. I can’t get it unclogged. It’s not draining at all and now there is shit water rising to the top.

Me: Dylan!! There is shit water everywhere. It’s splashing on me. Where are you???

Dylan: Relax. And do this. Push it right in there and use small short strokes to build up the pressure.
Me: That’s what she said.
Dylan: I love you.
Me: I know.

It was Valentines Day this week.
Dylan and I are not celebrators of this commercial day. I don’t need a day to show my love.  I’m just not very good at the romantic stuff any day of the year. I really don’t need the pressure of February 14th to point out my shortcomings.
I can do that all on my own.

But as I thought about this text conversation, I have decided to officially declare February 16th as a new holiday:

“Shit Water Day”.

Because that my friends, is what it’s all about. Being able to celebrate and acknowledge the love of my life that supports me and makes me laugh everyday.  Even when standing in shit water.

Happy Shit Water Day Dylan.

That’s everyday real love and I don’t need roses for that. Screw Valentines Day and its fluffy unicorns and rainbows. Go tell someone you love how much you love and appreciate them through the ups and downs of everyday real life and how much they mean to you on this, the very first official Shit Water Day.

I can’t wait to see what Hallmark comes up with.
I think it may catch on.
Xo J



14 comments:

  1. ROTFLMAO . . . Yup . . . that is the definition of LOVE . . .

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    1. I was not laughing a the time. I was not laughing as I cleaned the bathroom. But I was laughing at our relationship...always laughing!! It's how we have stuck together for so long!
      J

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  2. I think you're going to need a team of PR monkeys to help you catapult Happy Shit Water Day to the top of the holiday heap, Jessica.

    But you never know.

    This was one of those posts that I wish you had sent me for my blog, but I'm glad it appeared here, as it was utterly brilliant.

    Great job. Again.

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    1. I totally think it could catch on. I know you told Mrs. Hook Happy Shit Water didn't you!
      Share the love!
      J

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  3. My husband and I could celebrate Happy Shit Water Day at least once a week. Our youngest has some holding issues and plugs up our toliet on his weekly visit.

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    Replies
    1. I blame the new low flow toilets. Not enough water pressure. That and saving it for your house!
      J

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  4. Too funny and yes, yes, I've shared many Shit Water Days with Hubby so, our love would last forever. So far got through 36 years and countless SW Days!!

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  5. jessica . . .here is your plumbing tip of the year: next time this happens BEFORE you get the plunger pour a kettle of HOT water down the potty . . . it will make the problem dissolve! [My older sister gave me this tip when we were briefly roomates and her son was . . . well . . . you get it.]

    Elizabeth

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  6. I am impressed with the effort you have so obviously put into this content. I am also impressed Mothers Day Hampers with your point of view on this topic, especially since you have made your points so clear.

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  7. I suppose its good enough to use some of your ideas!!

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  8. Great delivery. Outstanding arguments.

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  9. I truly love your site.. Great colors & theme.

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  10. Your writing taste has been surprised me. Thank you

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